Summer Family Connection 1999
Chapel Hill Presbyterian Church

Wanted! Children after God's Own Heart!

A serial melodrammer in 5 Acts - by eldrbarry

[Wanted! Home . Act 1 . Act 2 . Act 3 . Act 4 .Act 5]

Act 2 : Pards! Scene 1 - Sheriff's Office, Cowtown

Windy: There is a lot of talk in Cowtown about the coming election for Sheriff. Sheriff Saul has been the Sheriff for many years. He has kept Saloons out of Cowtown, and it is generally safe to walk the streets, providing, of course, . . . you watch where you step.

[Enter Snidely, {"Boo"} who pantomimes stepping into a cow patty with disgust] {"horray"}. . . (Talking to himself)
Snake: Cowtown [with disgust] What this town needs is some class! A high class saloon! Selling my rot gut sarsaparilla at ridiculously high prices! Some dishonest Gambling! And some Dance hall floozies! But I have got to get rid of that pesky Sheriff first! How can I do that! Come on Snidely, my man, think! If only he were off chasing outlaws! But who would he chase? Think, Snidely, think!

[Davy walks by playing his harmonica, Clema merrily in tow. Snidely watches them pass by and then grins. A wicked laugh.] Snake:Oh, Snidely! You've outdone yourself! While that Sheriff is off chasing that na´ve little lamb, the wolf will get into the fold! But first I need me some posters, and a certain little slingshot! {"Boo"}{Laughs and exits as Sheriff and John enter from opposite side.]

Saul: There goes that Shepherd boy with my daughter again! I just know he's after my badge. You've heard the people talk, Deputy! "Saul's catching fish while Davy gets the Outlaws."
John: Well, Sheriff, we was a hiding when Davy knocked down that Outlaw with his slingshot, and it was you that hung that gone fishing sign up on . . .
Saul: [angrily] Don't remind me of that!
John: The kid has spunk. In fact he and I are sort of Pards now. I still think you ought to make him a deputy. It might get you a few more votes from folks in Cowtown.
Saul: If I hear any more talk like that, you will be out of a job for sure. Pards with a shepherd! Thew!
John: I didn't mean nothing, Sheriff, honest. But It sure seems like some evil Spirit has a grip on your heart.
[They exit]

Scene 2 - The Sheriff's Office(Several days later)

Windy: A few days later, the Sheriff disposition has not improved. Someone has been putting up Davy Fer Sharif posters around town. Sheriff Saul has just torn down another. . . Meanwhile, Davy has been in town quite a bit lately. Clementine makes Davy lemonade and encourages him to play his harmonica for her. She's also been suggesting to her father that Davy would make a fine deputy. Right now they are in his office.

[Enter Clema and Davy.]
Clema: Oh, Davy! I just love to listen to you playing the harmonica.
Davy: Ah, tain't nuthin, jest some songs my Pappy Jesse taught me. I play them while watching the sheep.
[Sheriff enters]
Saul: (To Audience) I knew I smelled sheep {"thew"} Clementine, how many times have I told you this is an office, not a courting parlor!
Clema: Oh, Daddy! Davy is just playing his harmonica for me!
Saul: I thought it was a cat with his tail in the door!
Davy: I play it for the sheep. It calms them down at night! Lets them know I am nearby with my slingshot to keep them safe. [lays his slingshot on the table]
Saul: Well have you been putting up these posters? "Davy fur Sharif". [he reads]
Davy: It's not me! I can spell better than that!
Saul: Well then, who! If that varmint were to walk in the door, I'd plug him for sure.
[a knock, then Snidely enters] {"Boo"} [Frowns at audience]
Snake: Good afternoon Davy. Miss Clementine . . [grasping her hand for a kiss, he leers at her] Saul: [coughs] [she pulls her hand away]
Snake: Oh, . . . and you too, Sheriff.
Saul: Haven't you left town yet, Drummer!
Snake: I thought I'd stick around til the election, and give you some morale support.
Saul: I'd rather have a skunk for a supporter than you!
Snake: Why Shariff? Fur in fact, I jest saw someone putting up these Negative Campaign Posters [drops a handful of Davy posters on the table] just across yonder thoroughfaire.
[As Clema and Saul and Davy rush to look, Snake waves and pockets the slingshot.]
Saul: I don't see anyone!
Snake: Oh maybe I was wrong! Well good day to you! Especially to you, my Darlin Clementine.
[He leers gripping her hand, till Davy gives him a had look - then leaves.] {"Boo"}
Saul: If I get my hands on whoever is making these posters, I'll arrest 'em for public nuisance, or littering or bad spellin or something!
Clema: You could use some calming down, Daddy! You are worrying too much about the election. Why don't you set a spell and listen to him play. I'll go make some lemonade!
[She exits, Davy starts playing. Saul takes a pistol or gun and starts cleaning it. He picks up his chair and moves over away from Davy. He looks long at Davy. A wicked thought, he looks at the pistol, then looks around to see if anyone is watching. then again at Davy. He takes a shot at the floor near Davy.]
Saul: Opps! [a second shot] Opps!. [Davy jumps, then runs from the room as Saul rises and empties the pistol in Davy's direction] Opps! Opps! Opps! [Swings his fist in a darn I missed motion]. Clema rushes in.]
Clema: Daddy, you almost shot Davy! I've got to see if he is alright! [Exits]
Saul: [Dropping the pistol, head in hands] I was cleaning it, it just sort of went off . . . [he exits]

Scene 3: Clementine's Boarding House

Windy: It was later that evening that Davy became an Outlaw. It began with a robbery at the Bank. The masked bandit entered the bank just before closing, pulled a slingshot on the teller and took off with 503 dollars and 48 cents. The teller and all the bystanders told Sheriff Saul and Deputy John, he smelled like sheep! {"Thew"} Clema has found Davy at Clementine's Boarding House.

Davy: I don't know why your Father shot at me Clementine. I thought I could play the harmonica O.K.
Clema: It was an accident, Davy. I'm sure father didn't mean it! He wouldn't shoot you, Davy.
[John rushes in]
John: Davy! I'm glad I got here first! The bank has been robbed and Sheriff Saul and the whole town thinks you did it!
Davy: What! I have been right here.
John: Well, the robber had your slingshot, and he smelled like sheep!
Davy: My slingshot! It's gone! I remember . . . I left it on the table at the Sheriff's office.
John: Sheriff Saul's mighty upset. He might just shoot first!
Davy: He already has!
John: Has what?
Davy: Tried to shoot me.
Clema: Davy, we got to get you out of town till we straight this out.

[From offstage: Saul: Davy, you outlaw! I know you are in there. Throw out that slingshot and come out with your hands up!]

John: He's here already? He doesn't know I'm in here. I am supposed to be watching the back door.
Clema: Go out the window, Davy, I'll stall Dad! [Davy starts out, then John stops him]
John: Maybe I can talk some sense into him, but if not, maybe you'd better run, Pard! I'll signal you. Wait out back in the dark. If I shout "There he goes, down the street" then head for the hills. I'll try to help you, Pard! But you had better take your refuge in the Lord. All I can, after all I'm the deputy and He's the Sheriff! [John exits, Davy hides in the Audience] [Saul enters]
Saul: Clementine! Where is that no-good sheep-smelling bank-robbing ex-boyfriend of yours. I know he's here.
[Clema moves to block Saul's movement, he pushes past her, looks under table, around the room] Clema: Davy ran upstairs when he heard you shouting. He's scared you will shoot him. What's this about the bank?
Saul: No time. [exits, Searches] Not here!
Clema: Did you check all the closets?
Saul: Nope, not here!
Clema: Under the beds?
Saul: Not here!
Clema: Behind the doors?
Saul: Nope, Not here either!
[Saul returns]
Saul: I was sure that no good, sheep smelling, bank robbing sheriff wanna was here!
[John enters]
John: Sheriff, he's not out back! Are you sure it was Davy?
Saul: He's armed and very dangerous. You saw him fell that Big Bad Man. We probably should shoot first! We know he's guilty! Sheep! Thew!! Knew he was no good! Dead or alive, I'm gonna get him!!
Clema: Daddy, No! [starts crying]
Saul: Deputy, Did he go out back?
John: No! But maybe he went out the window? I'll look. [Looks points toward wings, then yells} "There he goes, down the street!"
[Saul rushes out, Davy exits through back of Audience, Clema cries]
John: [loudly to himself] Run, Pard, Run! [He takes Clema by the arm and they exit]

[Snidely enters wearing a mask, holding a slingshot and a bag of money] Run Davy Run! Go Sheriff Go! Cowtown is mine. [Fiendish Laugh and exits]

Windy: So now you know how Davy became an outlaw running from Saul in the wilderness. Will Saul catch him dead or alive? Will Snidely take over the town? Our story will continue.

© 1999 Barry McWilliams and Chapel Hill Presbyterian Church. Please e-mail for permission to use.

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